DRAFT
Group-Care Meeting 
January 22, 2021

Participants:    Paul K-F, Barbara, Robert, Katie, Pete, Nolan, Arian, Von, Christy K, Thomas, Robin, Lisa, Chloe, Hala, Karen, Jim, Arian,, Rene, Diane, Volney

Number of total participants: not noted

1.    Call to Order/Opening Prayer

The meeting was called to order around 8:45 a.m. EST and the Serenity Prayer was read.

2.    Chair, Timekeeper, Secretary
	Chair: Paul
	Timekeeping: Barbara
	Secretary:    Volney

3.    Business - Following Group Comfort Rules

Paul informed group that this was a scheduled 45-minute meeting with the opportunity to extend the meeting if agreed upon. A motion was made to keep the meeting to 45 minutes without an extension option.    This was not seconded.

The Group Comfort Rules were screen-shared, and the meeting was opened for discussed.

Barbara asked if people felt the comfort rules were being adhered to and commented on her noticing people were being triggered and voicing their grievances related to comfort rules not being followed. She also brought up how the 15 minutes before the meeting was being used and encouraged looking at this area as well.

Katie mentioned importance of safety and inappropriateness of some of the messaging in the chat. She also voiced importance of the need for this cross-talk to be addressed before it grows. It was also brought up that the various individuals running the break out rooms were not following the script and she had noticed an abrupt tone communicating someone’s time was up.

Robert informed the meeting that in the Leader/Moderator training, the issue as to what to do when someone goes over time has not been addressed. He also informed the group that the current chat features were in month-long trial, and would be reevaluated at the next Group Conscience meetin.

Pete mentioned more emphasis was needed to communicate cross-talk rules. Was also suggested approximately a two-minute sharing period be acceptable. It was also shared that more reminders as to the two-minute time allocation be communicated.

Nolan shard he thought comfort rules were followed 98% of the time and that he did not feel mistakes being made were ill-willed.   He asked the question of whether to address the concerns and mistakes being made on an individual or group basis.

Arian asked how long shares should be and Paul informed him of the two-minute time.  Arian said he has overall felt welcomed in the group. He did mention receiving a chat comment that was not helpful after sharing and categorized it as cross-talk.

Von said she found the chat option helpful and appreciated the helpful information being shared.

Kristy spoke of the ability of chat to be used as a way to ask for help in real time and importance of that feature. She also voiced a discomfort if members are being timed by room leaders.

Thomas indicated chats were very helpful and brought up idea of, using the chat, asking a fellow traveller if it was okay to comment on someone else’s share before commenting.

Robin likes the announcements and service information in the chat, and said the comments on people’s shares are not needed. She introduced the concept of using the contact list if one wanted to comment on an individual share.

Lisa said her experience with the chat feature had been supportive and helpful; for example, she mentioned feeling encouraged by someone relating to her or giving a virtual hug.

Chloe mentioned safety in breakout rooms and the importance and benefit of using the script for creating a comfortable vibe. She spoke of space, comfort and liking the humble approach in the scripts.

Hala said she feels safe 99% of time. She mentioned helpfulness of the support she has felt in a mixed ( male/female) group. She also spoke of liking the idea of asking before commenting on a share. She likes the chat option and did not want to punish the whole group by eliminating or restricting the chat because of the mistakes of a few. She likes the present moment feedback ability of the chat function.

Robert brought up we had 10 minutes remaining of the 45 minutes and asked if the group had any motions related to the script or monitoring the situation.    The group subsequently agreed to a 10-minute extension to the meeting.

Barbara suggested before moving toward solutions that anyone who had not shared be heard.

Volney shared liking the current format but voiced his own personal concern in how to feel safe if choosing to bring up difficult traumas that are not routinely mentioned in the rooms.    He mentioned not wanting to experience the don’t talk rule experience within our group.

Jim said he did not witness a lot of cross-talk and likes the ability to communicate with his co-host in asking them if they want to share versus asking out loud during the meeting. 

Barbara brought up the question of needing more training and how to handle potential chronic offenders.    She mentioned importance of creating space, gentleness, and avoiding abrupt transitions when one's time for sharing has come to an end.

Katie mentioned one's personal responsibility to speak up and questioned what to do with offenders of the group comfort rules.

Arian indicated he did not want to restrict the chat and brought up importance of language and training.

Nolan drew attention to that in the ACA program we are learning how to use boundaries and mentioned the possibility of having a service position to help facilitate the discomfort of reaching out to another when they may be ignoring or unaware of following the comfort rules.

Hala liked the idea of adapting the appropriate language to use in the breakout rooms and would like to see the chats in the breakout rooms continue. Additional training was mentioned along with the possibility of having a second designated person in the room to assist and offer gentle reminders when diverting off course. She shared it being okay for us to make mistakes and discouraged us from becoming more strict.

Rene mentioned appreciating chat being on, suggested more exploration into the    topic and brought up the distinction between process vs rules to catch problems.

Diane mentioned liking the idea of re-looking at the language we use.

Barbara voiced benefit of having time for the information shared today to be processed and informed the group of our time drawing to an end.

It was suggested that for the next meeting, people bring forward motions with potential solutions to the issues that are being raised.

There was discussion on a date for a follow-up meeting. Thursday, February 28, 2021 at 8:45 a.m. EST was decided upon.

4. Adjournment/Closing Prayer

The meeting was adjourned at about 9:50 a.m. EST and closed with reading of the Serenity Prayer.